July 1, 2012 by canadianjimbo
Developed by Climax Group
Crom is a barbarian warrior feared throughout the land but lays down his sword to live a life of peace until one day the Gods say “Screw that” attack his village and trick him into murdering his lady love. As you can imagine Crom is less than pleased at this turn of events and with the aid of the mysterious Morrigan sets out on a quest that will see him murder the entire Celtic pantheon.
So it’s like God of War, with less interesting environments, and less colour and Celtic deities instead of Greek ones. Dear lord was this monotonous; all you do is kill things, when you’re not killing things you’re moving from one area to the next. You can kill things with a crossbow, a sword, a warhammer or a pair of claws. You have a ton of moves and combos for these weapons which you will never ever use. Why you ask? The camera is against you and enemies swarm, meaning you’ll miss key signs that your about to get sliced (only having three colours in the entire game just compounds the problem), thus your most effective strategy will be to rush an enemy, swat him once or twice, dodge, run away, repeat until everybody’s dead. This soon gets tedious. So tedious in fact I quit sometime during the 4th or 5th level whichever The Mire is. Perhaps I might have stuck with it if there had been something to break up the monotony like a puzzle or two, or if the writing had been decent.
Alas the writing is not decent. Crom shots a lot and everyone calls him “The Destroyer” apparently believing he’s part of some prophecy. The Gods believe Crom will destroy them…so why’d they engineer his wife’s death? Or maybe it was really Morrigan who practically screams 3rd act betrayal but I don’t care to find out I’ve wasted enough of my life on this.
Aesthetically Bloodforge seems to be channeling ether iteration of Warhammer so much so that if I where Game Workshop I’d be consulting my lawyers. Whereas Warhammer elevates grim dark to an almost mythic level, Bloodforge just seems like a pale imitation, and well it was gratifying for about 15 minutes after that I lost all interest.
Bottom line. Don’t waste your money, play any iteration of God of War. If you don’t own a PlayStation then read a book on Celtic Myth you’ll be better for it and you won’t be encouraging Climax to make anymore Kratos clones.